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07 June 2010

Broken Hearted Girl

Im giving up with all the undistinct relationship thingy. Should I still keeping it lasting if the partner treats me wonderfully well? Hahaha yes its terribly funny when I thought that he has feeling to me. Its terribly funny when I saw him stared at me. Its terribly funny when . . . oh yeah please finta, u are not in the dreamland. U have to wake up!

I don’t know why it feels so right to be there with him. I don’t know why it feels so right when this resent heart pumping for him. and then he broke me fastly. After he treated me fucking well, after all the things that we’ve been experiencing together, and he easily acted like. . “well, it doesn’t mean anything”. Oh beautiful .. then I went away. I tried to close our book even though it was so hard. My head was totally full of him. Damn! Could he just do respect me of what I’ve done?

Yeah, he respected me!! He respected all of my effort to forget him with his fucking smile, his stupid texts, and his silly poems. Oh my. . I cant see what his mean.

When he was telling me the truth, I have already known. But it was cutting me so deep when he officially said. Something like.. general secret for him but when he confessed directly to me, it feels more more more painful though I’ve already known by my thorough looooooooong time ago.

I dunno what in my heart now. I’ve already fell to deep onto him and its too late to get myself back to normal. Maybe I was too na├»ve to bear a meaning of his treat. Something that making me more more buried and sadden. What an evil boy.

I should’ve believe to my besties. They said they didn’t agree if I and him together. He was nothing but a dirty minded and faced boy, said one of my besties. And with no reason, another besties said that she didn’t like him. feeling, she said. And what about me? Love successfully blinding my eyes. Hhhhhhhhhhh… hate that.

Do you know what was his damn confession? He loves another girl before he was with me. When their relationship getting worst and they lost contact, he approached me. And now, he get his spirit to fix his last relationship after he got me crazy. And he TOLD ME like .. nothing happened between us but a friendship. Oh where is your brain, boy? Where is your heart for making me as your release?

And the girl he talks about is totally different with me. And I don’t think to make my self like her for catch his heart back to me. BACK?? Did he ever put his heart to me? Oh you are so fake, boy! I totally shocked when I know our memories that so meaningful to me, in his eyes it means nothing. I feel so stupid. Very very dumb.

What were you doing boy? Were you just wasting your time with me? Was hurting a girl heart is your consolation? Are you satisfied enough to know that u are successfully played me? Hahaha is it funny?

Im not kind of girl who beg for love. No no that’s not my style. So, just do what you wanna do, boy. Im here, listening to you as how you consider me to be. Yeah, however I need you. *emeng epeh to finn ..


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